Grade A Jade
I did a little interview (in my dreams) with Jade Raymond, the hotty producer of Assassin’s Creed over in Ubisoft.
Mad: When’s Assassin’s Creed coming out?
Jade: November 13th. Duh.
Mad: Is it worth me rolling all my pennies to buy?
Jade: Yes. Duh.
Mad: Will I be able to rip off all my clothes and run through the streets buck naked ala Will Farrell in Old School?
Jade: Uhh…no.
Mad: Your game sucks then. That is the ultimate in crowd control.
Jade: Uhh…ok.
Mad: So really then, this overhyped piece of shit is just a Prince of Persia sequel disguised as a good game?
Jade: Those are your words, not mine.
Mad: So, a little birdy told me Assassin’s Creed to hand helds?
Jade: Hmm…maybe.
Mad: Don’t be so aloof. I’ll smack that smug look out of that pretty li’l head.
Jade: Fine. Yes.
Mad: What do you have to say to all the pre-pubescent boys who see you and froth at the bit like a pedophile at a playground?
Jade: Fuck off, I only attend carpet sales.
Mad: Is it true you are just a figurehead of beautality for Ubisoft and don’t actually do anything in the office but file your nails and flick your hair at all the pasty nerd programmers?
Jade: Beautality isn’t a word idiot. And yes.
Mad: If you could seduce one person in #Hostile who would it be and why?
Jade: Definitely Alc. 1st place in the EPL league just makes me soak my undies.
Mad: God I hate you.
